Well, this year has been quite eventful and uneventful at the same time.
Usually, when I go for an exam, I am so well prepared that if I reach early, I revise the entire syllabus in the waiting time in my head but this time I was unprepared for an exam and I reached the exam hall an hour early. I went inside and I had nothing to do, there was absolute silence, we were not supposed to talk to the stranger sitting next to us, we neither had a pen or a paper to doodle or phones or anything. I just had to sit in one place doing nothing at all.
I stared at all the people around me, I looked at people’s clothes, I counted the number of lights and fans in the room, I basically observed every single thing around me and I watched my mind having all sorts of thoughts. There was a constant conversation between me and my mind where I was asking my mind to stop thinking about all the rubbish shit it was thinking and cooking up random scenarios, all of them had to stop and I came back to the present moment and then there was this conversation- exactly why I should stop thinking and be in the present moment because darling, there is officially nothing to do in the present moment except to stare at the clock and time pass by like that before the exam begins.
And that is when it hit me that exam halls are pseudo meditation centers.
I was constantly aware of my thoughts, my surroundings, my mind, and my breath too and when the question paper was in front of me, I was not thinking about how I am hungry or how someone had hurt me or anything like that. I was completely there, writing my exam and I did not even for once think that if I had studied, I would be writing a better exam, no. I had all these thoughts and reflections after the exam was over and I was riding back in the metro.
Now I finally understand that why life is called an exam, life in itself is a very big and giant exam and we all are constantly living that exam except that we are not aware that we are writing an exam and hence we often fail because we don’t live in the present moment, we are always living in a world created in the past or in future but not where we are exactly.
Let’s change that. Should we?