life · scribbles · Travel Diary

Artisans of Bikaner and The Kalbelias

Hello Dear Readers,

In my last post, I talked about how this year has been. How much I have learned and how this year has been a year of traveling and how I intend to make the most out of the last chapter of 2018.

So here I am, sharing another experience which I think might be worth your time.

I happened to take another tour with Miss Guide You and this time it was to Bikaner.

Bikaner is a city in Rajasthan where people don’t really go for the traveling experience because it is not hyped much for whatever reasons. Tourist companies focus mainly on Jaisalmer, Udaipur, Jodhpur, and Jaipur. It is mostly the foreigners who are exploring the cities of Rajasthan, come to Bikaner or film-makers who know about the place. There have been documentaries made by National Geographic and other foreigners and international organizations about the city of Bikaner.

Among Indians, Bikaner is famous for Bhujia and Sweets and that is about it.

So, this tour was one of its kind. It was not a regular tourism package by anyone, it was a carefully curated craft tour which was personalized and planned in an advanced fashion. There was a lot of research done by the people planning this tour- Kriti Bisht and Ashish Godara, the people who run the organization called Miss Guide You and you could see that a lot of research work has been done to get the kind of experience you were getting on the tour.

On the first day of our tour, we visited the famous Karni Mata Temple. I remember seeing a documentary on this when I was in school and I was so scared to enter to a temple which housed more than 15000 Rats but I did and I don’t remember praying there, I went inside and was just looking around me and taking care of my feet. Visiting this temple was a personal achievement and I am still scared of rats.

Here is a 5 minute documentary by National Geographic Channel: Welcome to the Rat Temple

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This one is a very awkward picture of me with Kriti, standing far away from rats, smiling only because of the camera. It was very difficult to smile in that situation when I was fearing rats.

Post this experience, we had our first workshop – Learning the art of Pugal embroidery from a Pugal artisan.

Who are Pugal Artisans?

Pugal artisans are women who were displaced from Pakistan in 1971, and settled in Thar Desert and used their skills of embroidery to earn a living with dignity. But over time, with privatization and onset of FDI and MNCs, these crafts of Rajasthan are dying and Mr. Ashok Bishnoi, founder of The Charkha is trying to support these artists. Miss Guide You partnered with him and organized the entire tour.

The Embroidery Workshop was one of its kind, we actually practiced the art and not just see it or gain a theoretical knowledge, it was a hands-down experience and we were very happy after our “Tedhi Medhi” Creations.

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My mother after her creation of Criss-Cross Pattern and you can see the happiness of creating something on your own. Art is therapeutic and this workshop gave just the feeling.

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Here we are with our teacher, taking lessons in embroidery.

The end of the first day was marked by a candlelight dinner in our Hotel- Harasar Haveli. Pure aesthetic experience it was.

Day 2

The start of the second day was quite touristy- we went to the Bikaner Fort, hired a guide and learned about the history of Bikaner, the fort and all the kings who ruled Bikaner and which King contributed what etc. We got a lot of pictures clicked and it was one fun experience.

After this, we headed to Raisar Village where we met the people who do handloom weaving. We met the weavers, learned how to use the handloom, even worked with the Charkha and talked to the people there, got to know about the entire process of Shawl Making from step one. We met the families, played with the kids and petted Camel.

There are very few people who are left in Bikaner that actually work with the Handloom and the people who know the art of handloom weaving are not teaching their next generation because of how the world is changing. As we are moving toward a globalized economy, these little weavers and craftsmen are bearing the brunt of it. The crafts which are native to Rajasthan, India are not being appreciated by our own people because we live in urbanized cities and work in corporate offices where blending with the western culture has become the norm. But looking at it from the environmental perspective, the clothes that are made from handloom have minimum carbon footprints while the jeans and the regular clothes that we all wear in the daily routine contribute to the environmental pollution and loss of natural resources and not many people are aware to think like that. Through such trips and this post, I hope we are able to bring attention to this issue and do whatever we can as individuals to help these artisans, their livelihoods and our environment on the whole.

After having an enlightening session with the weavers, we spent the night in the middle of nowhere in the Thar Desert where we did open-air camping, made our own food and slept on Camel Carts. The evening was marked by Kalbelia Performances and Stargazing. I don’t remember seeing millions of stars all at once in so long, that was one exquisite experience for which I really don’t have words. So, I’d rather talk about the Kalbelias.

The Kalbelias

The Kalbelias are a nomadic tribe of Rajasthan. They roam around and form clusters, their main form of survival is through Dance Performances. They are the original Snake Charmers. In Namaste London Movie, it was said that India is a country of Snake Charmers and then Akshay Kumar talked about how India has achieved so much and still people think that we are a nation of Snake Charmers, with that reference, they are the ones who are actually the snake charmers and with the recent Wildlife Act, they earn a living through Dance. It was wonderful to note that their dress and dance movements resemble the typical movement of the snakes. The women who perform the Kalbelia Dance are dressed in Black with beautiful work on their dresses and these women design their own dresses while the men provide the music. Kalbelia dance form is not so much famous in India as such, however, it is the foreigners who identified the beauty and the grace of this dance form and made several documentaries on them.

We even met the kalbelia people there and went to one of their clusters where we saw thw work of the women and talked to the kids there and saw the snakes and how comfortable they all were while I was a bit scared. The Kalbelias were very much aware of the politics of the country and were dressed up in stylish dresses. They may not have a a lot of money with them but their swag was unmatched.

Below, you’ll get the glimpse of our Day 2

Group Picture at the Bikaner Fort

With the Kids from the Weaver Families

Trying to get hold of the Female Snake in the Kalbelia Cluster

Understanding the process of Weaving

 

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Waking up in the Camel Carts after a night of Stargazing and Kalbelia Performances

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The beautiful Kalbelia Woman performing the Kalbelia Dance in the traditional Kalbelia dress made at home.

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Here is me trying my hand at working with the Charkha

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The Extremely Stylish Kalbelia Kids

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So much swag in one photograph-The Kalbelias

Day 3

On the third day of the tour, we went to the Old Bikaner City to learn the art of Tie and Dye. We all were given plain white cloth and all of us got a hands-on experience of making our own stoles.

Usually, we just go to the store and ask for a stole and bargain for the price and our shopping is done. We don’t realize how much time and effort goes into the making of a simple tie and dye scarf. It took all of us and seven artisans to make one stole. I really want to describe each and every process and aspect of it, however, I feel that will take away from the experience that it was. So for this one, I am gonna leave out details and would urge you all to go and experience this on your own. This day was exhilarating and we were all laughs at the end of the workshop. The ones who taught us were so much patient and loving that it was worth it.

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The trip ended with a food walk where we all had the best Ghewar of our lives. “Once you die and go to heaven, that was probably the first meal you will get” these are the words of our tour organizer- Ashish Godara.

With this, I end this post.

When this tour was being planned, I really thought it was a little bit expensive for three days, however, at the end of it, it was more than worth it. Spending money on things sure gives us happiness, however, investing money on experiences is a little bit better, this one experience is something which I will cherish forever because it was more than “little bit better”

Images Courtesy: Ashish Godara

 

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life

Where is the light?

 

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We are the millennials, the people who read a lot and who belong to the hookup culture, whose values are often questioned and we are the generation that talks a lot about mental health. But we are also the ones who are constantly trying to better ourselves as humans. Working on oneself is a tiring and tedious process. While it is the most important thing to do to get through and get ahead in life, it is mentally exhausting as well.

Why working on oneself is mentally exhausting?

  1. Because you are constantly aware of your shortcomings as a person and you are constantly trying to overcome them, it creates self-imposed stress.
  2. Results of working on ourselves take years to show, you don’t become a saint in a day, and in the process, there are many instances where you feel like a failure and all your efforts seem worthless because you cannot help your shortcomings and insecurities and resulting behavior.
  3. Because you introspect a lot. It makes you question yourself way too much. You do not even realize it but you become very harsh on yourself and as well as become negative too, not about the situation, not about the people around you but about yourself, your feelings, your emotions and constantly feel apologetic to your loved ones for your behavior.
  4. Because you accept your faults and shortcomings and talk about your insecurities to your loved ones and while they help you get through most of the times, there are days and times when they tap into your insecurities and fears and hurt you either intentionally or unintentionally and you start doubting your trust in them.
  5. Despite all the 4 points above, you still love the way you love and sometimes people take that as you don’t have enough self-respect or you start questioning your self-respect too by putting up with the hurt which you know is eventually useful to you in your growth but still, you do.

 

What is the solution?

You breathe, you breathe and you accept yourself. You give yourself positive self-talk when no one else does. You got to be your own hero and you can be slow, you don’t have to win your battle against your shortcomings in a day. You are constantly a work in progress. So breathe. Eat well, sleep well, laugh well and cry well too. But don’t stop or close yourself, because it is this open space in your mind and heart which will help let the light of life enter you and brighten up your soul.

Only this much for today, feel free to share your own experiences and stories in the comment section below.

Analysis · life · scribbles · story

There are things left to say

Hello Dear Readers,

I hope you all are doing really well in your respective lives and even if you are not, better days are on their way, so have patience. It’s easier said than done but trust me, just try.

Anyway, I had put up a shutdown post sometime back. On 6th July 2018, I said that I will be shutting down this blog which I have built over a period of five long years because I wanted to take up blogging to another different level. I wanted to be professional in my writing. I wanted to write about economic issues and other important things that go around the world and help the student community majorly through that blog. While the work for that is under process, I still have things left to say. I am not a professional economics student 24*7. I am human and this blog represents the human side of me. I have experimented with all kinds of writings, emotions, ideas here, so I am back to my familiar writing space in a community where I do have a bunch of regular readers across the world, with whom I may not have personal contact but interactions on WordPress,  about ideas, poetry, writing and the feeling that no matter what, we are all the same people deep down is comforting.

Anyway, I have started to digress from the topic like I always do. I spend so much time setting up the context of the blog post that I get tired when I start to write the real thing. So without wasting any more time, I am here to talk about all the random stuff that comes to my mind while writing this. So no context. Feel free to leave reading at this point, or maybe get on with it and just go “Hmmmm, What did she actually say?” at the end. Your call. Choose Wisely. Here I start.

 

Sexual harassment and Mental Health are the two hot topics which we get to read about constantly on our social media accounts. Women are coming out with their stories which happened years ago, people are trying to talk about their mental health issues. There is so much good happening around us. We are in one of those times where we are actually using our freedom of expression and there are both sides to it. There are people in support and there are people who are mocking and demeaning us in ways which makes us fear the idea of talking about things that bother us. I refrain from talking about issues on social media because I personally do not have the energy to get involved in pointless debates on the internet that take away time, energy and mental peace. However, whenever there is a positive talk, I do indulge because even in the virtual world of technology, few positive words work wonders. Someone might have had a shitty morning and if you just tell them I hope you have a good day, much love to you, it might make them smile only for like 5 seconds but if they reflect and feel a bit lonely, this could be their cue to feeling a little okay at least if not better. In times like these, it is extremely important we choose the right things to read and write on the social media. Because there are bright sides and a dark hole which will consume you. And I am a person who is often confused so I have done both. I have been on the bright sides and I have been consumed by the dark hole.

And honestly, most of my writings and blog posts are for myself first and then for my readers. I am selfish that way. I like to write about things that hurt, I love to write about things that make me uncomfortable, that make me cry, that is cringeworthy at times as well because in my personal experience, this is the way I talk to myself, where I can be a friend to myself and enjoy my own company. And why I choose to put up such things on my blog is simply because I know I am not alone, there are a few bunch of people out there who think like me, who act like me, who are like me in so many ways and might just find comfort in their lives through these confused looking write-ups.

“It is always easier to be strong for your loved ones than for yourself.”

I read this line sometime back, somewhere. I don’t know the exact source, however, all I know is that this line has stayed with me for the longest time. I have had a tendency to attract all sorts of weird crazy broken people towards me and I used to think that it is my job to fix them all and I did that for years, since school time, since the time I remember having people around me. I was a people pleaser, I have always wanted people around me to be happy, even at the cost of my own happiness. Well, the world was not what I saw it to be with my rose-tinted glasses. People use and abuse good people like things and I have had my share of that. So now I am like chuck everyone, I rather started to enjoy the idea of offending people by not being always nice to them, mostly I became mean to my own relatives and aunts and uncles and anyone who did not give a good vibe. I became too judgemental and what I did was wrong, so don’t do that. Be nice to people, always. It is easy. And if you do not feel like being nice, back off, don’t offend someone, it hurts later. I have had my share of regrets there.
So I was reading a post I wrote in 2013, it said don’t let the negativity around you change the way you look at the world, be good and the good things and people will come to you. But I did not stick to what I believed in and used my negative experiences to build so many walls around me. I did let the negativity get to me and then a series of poetry and posts which I wrote had this one constant thought- I do not like the person I am becoming and suddenly I  was lost forever. I knew my way, I knew my road and I hid behind the words- Maybe, I don’t know. I was just too scared to open myself up again until sometime back. From being someone who was comfortable alone and enjoyed her own company a lot, I started to get dependent on the outside of the things to get happy, I started wanting to have company, being alone did not feel as peaceful as it used to because of so many self-created issues and disorder of overthinking and less writing. I stopped being my own lucky charm because I stopped being strong for myself. I was strong for others but not myself the way I used to be. And that is when I started to love myself a little less and get critical and at the same time wanted so much out of me as a human that all of it got too much. I had high ambitions and failures simultaneously and everything then turned out to be about me. I started caring a little less about others, even my loved ones, even the family I am a part of, I distanced myself from everyone, most importantly, from myself.

Perhaps, the only person we need to be strong for is ourselves. Loving oneself is the only important thing because if I love myself enough, I’ll love you enough and a virtuous circle will start instead of a vicious circle of being critical towards oneself and the world. This is what I have been realizing and learning every day for past couple of weeks

Why on earth I am putting all of this in a blog post? All the things mentioned here are personal experiences and ideas and thoughts and the journey? Why is it up here on the WordPress blog? Because I have a dear friend who once told me, you are not alone. There are crazy people out there like you who have similar issues, who have similar problems, who have similar thought patterns and that is why you find Instagram posts that relate to you, that is why you find poems that feel as if they are describing you, that is why you find books whose main character looks just like you because deep down we are all humans and I hope this post finds you. I hope it makes you feel less alone, I hope it makes you write, talk to the ones you love, create art, go to comfortable familiar places which remind you of who you are and I wish you find friends who throw away your personal dictionary of weirdly stupid ideas and help you correct the fundamental thought of life and most importantly make you feel loved and worthy enough because you are worthy without doing any productive thing on a lazy day and you deserve the happiness and love you are getting. Don’t be like me questioning happiness. Be you. Meanwhile, I’ll try to be a better me.

oh, did I tell you that when you sing at the top of your voice, that is the ultimate happiness? So my dear reader, what are you waiting for?

And yes, this blog is back to being alive. I’ll keep updating both. This one and the professional blog under construction, show some love there too when it is launched. Thank you all so much in advance.

life · scribbles

A goodbye.

To all my lovely readers,

This is a good bye post. I am planning to shut down this blog and start afresh. It was 5 years of practice of random blogging.

I don’t have much to say. Thank you!

See you on WordPress again with a new blog after sometime. 🙂

life · poetry · scribbles · story

Honeymoon For Home

I wake up with a smile on my face when the sun is about to rise and the sky has hues of blue and violet like the color of your shirt reflecting on the Marine drive of Bombay.

The clouds sing songs while they pour today while our hearts sing songs of love.

As the morning cup of tea touches my lips, I am reminded of the warmth of your touch while you held my hand while walking to the lake.

My bosom feels the compassion of love overflowing.

I am on my honeymoon.

I can’t expect too much from you. You can’t be my best friend, my lover and my wildest fantasy all at once.

Stories of lust speak to me on a soul level. In one complicated emotion.

But darling, you have been all of them at different points in time. And time my friend is relative and it is always borrowed.

Present is the only gift we have and you are my borrowed love from the universe.

We don’t talk routine anymore because of the warmth and heat we both radiate with our hotness and are to be blamed for Global Warming.

We are two misfits trying to love when life is busy.

Love in my very strong opinion is a personal thing and more than about us, it’s about our own selves and how we evolved together.

But as there cannot be a day without the night, we wouldn’t be who we are without the universe of us which we have created.

We are like two birds on a honeymoon reaching out to each other with our passions at it’s peak.

It’s the fireworks and explosions of our love that we both seek.

My neckline feels the traces of your fingers running over and there are temple domes rising on my skin.

I feel your hands pulling my waist while I make coffee in the kitchen.

I experience your presence while you are no where near me.

You are my home and I am on my honeymoon at a place longing for home.

While the home never existed at all.

Photograph by Neha Thureja

life · scribbles · story · Travel Diary

The Himachal Trail

Hello beautiful readers,

It’s been 5 years since I have been running this blog and today I was just randomly checking the stats for my blog and I was surprised to see that I have readers in 42 countries across the world and that made me so happy. I would love to thank each one of my readers for showering so much love for my writings which are irregular and mostly random in nature.

Well, so today I am here to talk about my first ever official tour. Well, it’s been more than a week since I returned. And I had planned on writing this blog post as soon as I came home. However, you know how writers are, right? They are big-time procrastinators when it comes to writing. Okay, okay, I should not generalize. I’ll talk about myself. I procrastinate a lot when it comes to writing because I may have written the entire article, report, blog post, poem or whatever that I want to or have to write in my mind, I am always trying to look for better words and phrases in between the bookshelves and sassy movies, and oh yes, songs too.

Honestly speaking, I had forgotten about the fact that I had decided to write this blog post that you are reading currently. Today, at lunch, our boss casually mentioned that these people did not send in any of their write-ups or feedback about their trip experience and bam, Thomas Edison of my mind lit up!

Enough of the introduction I guess. I should come straight to the point before I exhaust myself with the introduction only and end up writing nothing for the purpose I started writing this in the first place.

Oh, did I mention that I started a job in my previous blog posts? I think not. Well, I completed my post graduation just a month ago and headed off to a vacation- read this as Meditation Camp. I described it here in this post- https://euphoricbeing.wordpress.com/2018/05/12/vacation-diaries/
And I returned from the camp on 13th May 2018 and had my first day of office life on 15th May 2018. So that’s about it.

Well, details about my office life in some other post, on some other day. All you need to know is that I like my job and the people around me a lot.

Now, THE HIMACHAL TRAIL, for which you have been waiting for a while now after reading the above 403 words. I appreciate your patience, treat yourself to a cup of tea/coffee/whatever you like!

As a part of Office Capacity Building Tour, we went to Jibhi, Gushaini, Tirthan Valley and Jalori Pass for a week. This was my first ever road trip to the hills without my parents. I have been an extremely protective kid and never got permission to go on any of the trips with my friends. So this was kind of a lottery ticket for me as my parents could not say no because it was official.

  1. The Journey BeginsMy journey started on the morning of 2nd June 2018 along with my colleagues. We took an early morning Amritsar Shatabdi from New Delhi to reach Punjab Agricultural University, Ludhiana on the very first day. The journey was an amazing one with one cute incident, as you may call it.
    So I had to board the train at 7AM, I woke up at 5AM, had a quick bath, did last minute packing and rushed and got on the train on time. Now, I have traveled by Indian Railways a lot and Rajdhani and Shatabdi Express have great food. So as soon as I sat down, being a typical forever thinking about food Punjabi Upbringing I waited for the breakfast and IT DID NOT COME till 9:30AM. I legit went to the Shatabdi Cabin Crew and asked them about the breakfast around 9AM because I was HANGRY( I get angry when hungry so Hangry xD) and my colleague Surya noticed this, so by the time we reached, it turned out to be an inside joke between me and him and throughout the trip we shared a laugh whenever I quoted- I am Hungry!So we reached to Ludhiana, chilled around a bit and at night began with our road trip. So, mostly I have experienced motion sickness on road trips, therefore, I took my medicines, put on the most romantic playlist I could, and slept. I slept so much throughout the trip that next morning people said that I slept so much that I compensated for lack of sleep for others. I even tripped while sleeping and had forgotten about it until I was reminded about it later.
  2. Jibhi-The Lato Hut StayWe reached our destination on 3rd morning and checked into the resort-The Lato Hut. I loved the place but didn’t like the food. Presence of WiFi compensated for the food and the extra sweet tea which made me doubt the existence of tea leaves often. Every morning I would wake up around 6.30AM, go to the river right in front of the resort and read a book, listen to songs, make videos, chase the butterflies and put my feet in the water and do- Chhai Chhappa Chhai, Chhapak Chhai. This was my alone time in Lato Hut every morning.IMG_20180604_075805984.jpg
  3. Jibhi-Village Visit and Balu Temple and WaterfallIn Jibhi, we had three things- The Waterfall, The Balu Temple, and The Village Visit.
    I enjoyed all the three activities immensely. I have never had a bath in a waterfall. I have seen many but this time I had a bath too because my mother was not there to tell me I’ll catch a cold and since it was a small waterfall, I did not fear that I will fall and hurt myself as I am very much prone to falling because of I don’t know what defect.20180603_153023.jpgThe trek to Balu Temple was funny. I didn’t fall at the waterfall but fell twice in the trek to the temple and laughed it off like always because life is nothing but a comedy. Reaching the Balu Temple was giving me a feel of Qayamat Se Qayamat Tak movie with its ambiance. I felt like I was being in a Bollywood setting and sang the song- Gazab Ka Hai Din, Dekho Zara Ye Deewanapan Socho Zara.
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    The Village visit was a nice experience because a) I had never been to a village. b) The pathway leading to the village was so narrow and risky that I felt that if I tripped, I would injure myself badly. This was the time I was completely in the moment like it was taught in the meditation camp. This was the time of full awareness. c) I ate a sour apple picked right from the apple tree in the apple orchids.IMG_20180604_152009261_HDR.jpg
  4. Jalori PassRead about Jalori  Pass on Google. I know only one thing here-the location was perfect to wear bright colored chiffon sarees and dance to romantic songs of Yash Raj Movies where clouds flow around and there are winds and everything beautiful which words cannot really do justice to.IMG_3676.JPG
  5. Gushaini, Tirthan Valley

    I am a selectively lazy human being and I love to sleep a lot on my trips. This place took away my sleep. My parents and I are risk-averse people. Throughout my life, we as a family have stayed away from any sport or activity that could be potentially risky or dangerous, we are happy and content in our lazy bubble. Here, I indulged in Rappelling, River Crossing, River Jumping and damn I was scared. But I wanted to do the activities as well. So I was busy in a battle with my own self-The Head Vs Heart and as a result, I cried. I did not want to cry but I did. It was kinda embarrassing to shed those tears in front of everyone but then that’s what makes us human and I was not upset after that. I don’t know how I did all of it but I did it and I am so blessed to have such an amazing support system at the office. Very few people are lucky enough to go on such an official tour and overcome their fears and have a team that is so much supporting and close-knit. This was my happiest phase on the trip.
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  6. The Overall ExperienceOn the whole, this trip was life-changing for me. Each day was a new day, each experience was a new experience. I have wanted to have a trip like this for ages but never really got to have it until I had this job. This trip made me get comfortable with my people and shed away all my inhibitions. I sang and danced, I talked and laughed and I bonded well. It’s important to have friends in the workplace and this trip helped me make friends along with professional relationships.IMG_3724.JPG
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    When we are kids, we are asked to go to school, study well so that we get into a good college, build a good CV in college so that we get a job and when we get a job we wait for weekends to relax and wonder what next, however, I am at a point in life where I am content and I enjoy my work. Work does not look like a work when we tend to enjoy it. This job is probably the best thing that could happen to me. All the upswing and downswing during post graduation was worth it because had I been elsewhere, I don’t think I would have got the experiences and the learning I got here. My belief in the fact that Universe always has better plans for us, all we need to do is to be patient is stronger than ever.

    I have a long life ahead of me and so much more to do, the woods are lovely, dark and deep, I have miles to go before I sleep. But here I am, at a point in my journey where I learn, work and relax while I still have to learn the mechanism of income tax.

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    This much for today, see you all next time with new stories and some very random jokes.

life · scribbles · story

The Girl with a tainted heart?

Hola Readers!

Today I am going to talk about a girl with a tainted heart. But why her? Because the girl here is a part of me. My friends made me realize that I am not much of a poet but a blogger. I tell stories in a beautiful way, I am told.

Well it makes sense, I have been a story teller since childhood. Given the fact that I was one of the most shy kids in my childhood with absolutely no friends but only acquaintances, my primary source of entertainment was to create stories in my head about myself and the people around me.

My favorite story has been that of me having a twin sister. I was an only child when I created this story. My little brother was not born then and maybe I was in LKG or UKG, a very fat girl used to be my desk partner in school and she used to be quite irritating. I decided to have some fun. I told her that for the next couple of days I will not be coming to school and but my twin sister will be coming and she will be sitting with you. Don’t tell this to anybody. She is very shy and likes to keep to herself so don’t talk to her or disturb her. And this silly thing worked. That girl didn’t talk to me for a good couple of days and I continued with this drama for two weeks I think and then I told her that I am back and my twin sister has gone to another school. She won’t be coming and studying in this school, she wanted to take a trial and didn’t like it.

You must be thinking why am I telling you this when I was supposed to talk about the girl with a tainted heart. Well, honestly there was no point, I was just reminded of this little thing so shared it.

Anyway, I have had a lot of stories playing in my mind since forever, some become reality while some just pass off as fantasies and some are stories with a big question mark.

I have been in quite a reflective state for a few days, weeks or maybe months. I have evolved as a person in such a way that from being one of the most mysterious, quiet introverted person I have become an open book like that of a coffee table book which you find lying in expensive coffee shops for reading while taking your coffee. I no longer keep my thoughts just to myself. I make sure to say out loud things that matter and also the things that don’t really matter at times.

I happen to be a person who loves to be in love and I write several love stories for myself with a few characters here and there borrowed from my real life and these are the stories with a big question mark. Because while writing such stories in my head, I tend to fall in love for real and get messed up. And I spend my spare time sorting out the mess I create for myself. This is so pointless and so much fun at the same time.

But why the girl here is with a tainted heart?

I am tired of telling you the above random stories, for this, stay tuned. I will write part 2 soon where you will know why the girl is with a tainted heart.

Till then, good night!